The new season of The Apprentice has come to be, bringing us another set of unimaginable human beings competing in suits, with a combined arrogance that makes them seem like highly developed strain of Donald Trumps. Goat Eat Goat Yet…
According to a study by Wren Kitchens, children in the UK are expected to receive Easter Eggs worth up to 17,000 calories over the long weekend. Us adults, on the other hand, are often overlooked. Boost morale or at least raise a smile with a carefully selected thank you treat for your team. But which one to buy? We all want to be a sweet, tasty team, but are you and your co-workers more cheese egg than Creme Egg? And how on earth do you find out?
With the help of our handy quiz, discover egg-xactly which egg your team should buy before the Easter break.
1) My colleagues are
A. A little bit nuts.
B. Hipsters. All hipsters.
C. Giving up chocolate for Lent and regretting it very vocally.
D. A mixed bag.
2) Our office food policy consists of…
A. A filing cabinet with a bag of foreign boiled sweets on the top.
B. A trolley of goodies paraded around the office every afternoon. Think Hogwarts Express but BETTER.
C. Healthy snacks in the fridge and darling little pots of quinoa.
D. Fridays, when everyone decides to buy doughnuts – and the rest of the week where there are three stale doughnuts left.
3) On dress-down Fridays I wear…
A. White trainers and jeans with tactical rips.
B. My new Sibling t-shirt. My new Nikes. A beanie.
D. A suit. I forgot.
4) I travel to work…
A. In a lift-share with my colleague and a back seat occupied by dogs, child seats, a croquet set and a hidden rotting apple that everyone can smell but no one can find.
B. Occasionally. When I do, it’s by hoverboard.
C. By bike. Or foot.
D. Though a series of tunnels, tubes, lifts, steps and streets.
5) Our office Whatsapp group…
A. Is quite hard to explain to our boss.
B Is quite hard to explain unless you watch vintage episodes of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
C. Is called ‘(Business Name) Whatsapp group’ and features in-depth travel advice.
D. Is where memes go to die.
Count up your score!
Mostly A’s: You should buy the Moser Roth single origin egg, Aldi
Aldi does a single origin egg by Moser Roth in a zany zebra print. It’s fun, it’s a crowd pleaser, and it looks pretty slick. If this sounds a bit like you and your team… it is! A match made in eggy heaven.
Mostly B’s: You should buy A cheester egg
The cheese egg or ‘Cheester egg’ from ‘so wrong it’s nom.com’ is 260g of solid cheese moulded into egg form and presented in a Camembert case. If any of your colleagues fell foul of the crazy crowds at Borough Market’s massively oversubscribed ‘An Evening of Cheese’ then they will be hip enough to enjoy the irony of this magnificent monstrosity.
Mostly C’s: You should buy ‘The Family Combo Easter Egg’
This raw chocolate Easter egg is filled with figs, raisins and cashews and from The Raw Chocolate Pie Company. The bottom is made from vanilla fudge, the top is raw choc. The curious, the healthy and the unhealthy eaters can finally agree on something if you present this egg to them: figs are weird.
Mostly D’s: You should buy ‘Hotel Chocolat’s egg sandwich’
If your team’s been a bit up and down, maybe a little stressed, then you need some thick, good quality chocolate in a novelty form. Hotel Chocolat’s Easter goodies feature extra thick chocolate so you can snap it satisfyingly (a great stress reliever). The novelty ‘egg sandwich’ version is bound to cheer everyone up.
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